With my old age and wisdom I have learned a few things about this thing we call life.
One word of wisdom that I have learned that I have kept with me and use daily is:
"It is what it is" We are all given a hand of cards, even before we are born. We can't change what hand we are dealt, and we can't trade or get a new one. We just get to keep the cards and learn how to play with them. Even if our hand sucks terribly, and we lose a lot, that doesn't mean anything. We all need to learn to play the hands we are dealt and play it with love, patience, acceptance, and dignity. Some times its easy, and sometimes its hard. But honestly, it is what it is. And if we don't learn to just accept what is, and deal with it, and be happy about it than its going to be a hell of a long road to the end.
So, it is what it is. As hard as it has been to learn this "word of wisdom" its been a lot harder to LIVE it. But, the minute I made the change from feeling sorry for myself, and complaining about every complicated and "unfair" thing in my life I have never been happier.
That doesn't mean I don't get sad, or upset, or that I'm always 100% okay with what I was dealt, it just means that I have learned to ACCEPT it for what it is, and ACCEPT myself for who I am.
Some people call that "settling" well, I don't believe in "settling" I believe that we all know exactly what we deserve, and exactly what works for us. But sometimes we just get lost on the path. Sometimes we want other peoples cards and we are sick of our own. So because other people have things easier, or have a better life (all about perspective) than us that we are settling. Which is NEVER true. Which brings me o my second word of wisdom. "Perspective" Life is all about our perspective. Every creature, every being, has a perspective unique to their hand, and their life. Example: I was born with a rare genetic disease called nuerofibromatosis. I have type 1. When I was growing up (elementary-high school) I was harassed and made fun of because of the many birthmarks I have covering my body. There were things said and done to be that hurt, really bad. And it made school a living hell. Other than birthmarks and some nerve pain occasionally I had no other problems with my NF1. When I turned 17 that changed, drastically. The tumors that come with NF1 were finally here. And had decided to grow right on my spine. The tumor grew, and grew right on my spinal cord for months. In result I lost function of my right side of my body. I limped because I could hardly move my leg, I was in pain and couldn't feel my right side, all at the same time. My right arm just quit working. And I couldn't fell when my bladder was full..... if you get where I am going. Life just sucked. I cursed the hand I was dealt and I was miserable. After an MRI confirmed the tumor on my spine, and that it needed to be removed or I would become paralyzed, I was rushed into surgery. The thing about the NF1 tumors, is that even if you remove them they will eventually grow back. They are also like a ball of spaghetti. They wrap around nerve endings, and go every which way wrapping around muscles, nerves, and everything else they can get their hands on. They are VERY difficult to remove. And are only removed if they are in absolute need of it. And that sucks. They are very very VERY painful, and make life just hell. After surgery I had a new perspective on life. Which was weird. Most people have an Epiphany, or something. I just had a change of heart, a change of PERSPECTIVE. These tumors, and this excruciating pain are always going to be there. The tumors they can remove WILL grow back. And I can either have all this baggage AND be upset and miserable because my life sucks, and I feel bad for me, OR I can have all this baggage, and just deal with it. I can CHOOSE to be happy and to love life regardless of the hand I was dealt. It really is that simple. Perspective is everything. I have a dang good life! I have a loving husband, a baby on the way 2 little puppies whom I love! I have a car that runs, a steady-ish income. The crappiest,scariest apartment in the world. LOL and I have the most helpful, loving, amazing family in the entire world. Life is very difficult, and has many trials, and is full of stupid people, and its just plain unfair. But you have 2 ways to view it, and 2 ways to act. Life sucks, and so do I. or It is what it is, and I'm going to deal with it.
Its up to you.
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